gravity can't forget to pull me back to the ground.

So, I've been back in Tuscaloosa for a total of about 2 weeks and it's been a whirlwhind ever since I got back. Class takes up so much time because it moves at such a fast pace and I always have to study. I love being around the youth though, they honestly make my day most days of the week. I guess I just geniunely like the feeling of being on my own. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents, but I like to feel somewhat independent. And Tuscaloosa is close enough to home, that if I need to go back, it's not that big of a stretch. I think I pretty much have it made, if I do say so myself.

I love still being at Calvary during the summer. I love my home church, but Calvary has helped me grow on my walk with Christ more so than my home church ever did. I love being here to experience the love and warmth that comes from every one at that church. God is doing some stuff in my life that needs to be done, and I can't thank Him enough for loving me enouogh to discipline me time and time agian when I stray from Him. I think He is really taking this summer to help me refocus my life on Him. I've already been blessed with what I know is going to be an amazing bible study for the summer and I can't wait to see what comes of it.

My best friend got married this past Monday. It's so weird to think that she's only a little bit older than me and she's married. I've told her this before, but it kinda makes me feel like I'm behind on life. I mean, I don't know what I want to do with my major when I get out school, I don't have a boyfriend, and I'm nowhere close to even wanting to settle down and have a family or a husband. I guess I just find peace in the fact that God already wrote my story, and He knows better than I do when I'll be ready for "big girl world".

Anatomy is consuming my life.

sweet silver lining.

So, I'm sitting here watching Jon and Kate Plus 8, and I figured while I was sitting here, I would update this thing..not that anyone ever reads it. I think knowing that no one ever reads it gives me a chance to write whatever I want..which is cool.

I'm ready to go back to school. Have I said that before?

This summer is going to be alot different than I thought though due to recent events, ha. My job is now non-existent..things just didn't work out. So, I am going to concentrate all my efforts on the few things that I have to do. I'm going to do the best that I can in my two classes, spend lots of time with the youth, and get back into shape. I have realized since I've been home that I'm not near in the shape that I used to be. After the 1/2 marathon I completely stopped running. Then when I had my surgery I wasn't allowed to work out for a week. But, I don't need to use those as excuses anymore. I go to school to learn how to take care of myself, and I need to start doing that. It's time to get serious about my weight and things like that. I hate the fact that metabolism slows down...ugh, yay for getting older. Not.

I've also realized lately that my relationship with God is glimpsing into being a love for what He can do for me instead of who He is..and it's really been on my mind lately to change that. I'm so ready for the Hillsong concert Friday night. I need to be awestruck by my God once again. I love Jesus so much and I need to refocus my attention on Him.

So, this summer is going to be one for the books, I'm sure of it.

Does anyone on this planet know what real love is anymore?

with everything..we will shout forth Your praise.

I was reminded last night once again of how absolutely breath-taking God is. I went to a friend's band's concert and it absolutely floored me at how good those guys are. They write some of their own lyrics that are by far some of the most awesome words I've ever heard, and they have such a huge passion for everything they do. God has completely transformed one of the boys in the band and I can't thank the Lord enough for what He's done. I cried for the first time in a long time while he was playing a song he wrote about the journey he took to get to know the Lord. Ah, there are no words to adequately describe what I was feeling during that song, but all I know is that all the glory goes to the Father in heaven. He's the God of impossible things, and for that I am totally and eternally grateful.

Have I mentioned that I'm completely ready to go back to Tuscaloosa? Hm. It'll come soon enough.

I spent all day yesterday painting canvases for my dorm room next year. I haven't been able to sit down and paint in so long..and it was probably one of the most relaxing things I've done in a while.

Yesterday I made it a point to be positive in every circumstance and situation I am faced with. I know I'll slip up every once in a while..but yesterday was such a good day just because I had a better attitude about everything. Nothing miraculous happened, but I just enjoyed every little blessing that God put in my life and found joy in simple things. I think I'm going to like it this way.

I'm free to be me.

learning to wait.

So, I've seen alot of folks with this blogspot thing lately and I decided to give it a try.

I just got back from the beach today, and I'm ready to go back to Tuscaloosa already. I have a full week ahead of me before I go back though, so I guess I just have to wait. I absolutely loved the beach. I seriously think I want to retire somewhere near an ocean when I get old. I love the water; it calms me down like nothing else. I got to lay out on the beach, shop, and sleep alot so all in all it was a good vacation.

I had eye surgery last week, and while I can already see better than I used to without contacts/glasses, I still don't have 20/20 vision. The doctors said it would take anywhere from 2-3 weeks for my vision to get to that level, but I've had a very hard time waiting for it to clear up. On the way home from PCB, Phillipians 2:14 came to my mind, and I felt so selfish and weak when I thought about how much I hadn't been trusting God to heal my eyes in His time. I have been complaining every day since the surgery about how much I hate not being able to see and how I wish my vision would hurry up and get better now. I've been praying to God to heal my eyes every day and night but it was out of selfishness and a desire for my life to be on my time. I can't believe I didn't trust God fully to take care of a situation as simple as this. I complain about things far too easily, and I didn't realize how much until lately. I'm going to make a concious effort to a more positive person and be thankful for what God has given me in every situation that I"m faced with instead of wishing that things were different. God has each and every little bitty situation and trial under control and in His hands, and I think too often I forget that.

Anyways, I'm ready for my summer routine to start. I like routine.